(via whyant)


supersmashthestatebros:

okay, I lied. I don’t have my license to kill, but I do have my learner’s permit. as soon as my mom gets here, you’re toast.

(via whyant)


If only

If only


inories:

Going to Mcdonald’s for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

(via distraction)


oreooficial:

spelling bee administrator: your word is delicious
me: D to the E to the L I C I O U S to the D to the E to the to the to the
spelling bee administrator: hit it fergie

(via whyant)


dallonvveekes:

isnt that a panic at the disco album

dallonvveekes:

isnt that a panic at the disco album

(via thefuuuucomics)


masturbatetothis:

thesexqueen:

I would like this every evening. Please take note, sometimes slow and gentle is the key to making a girl cum. It’s a delicate space and we are not pornstars who want our pussys beaten just because you like the way it makes you feel strong. If you’re really invested in my pleasure you will listen to my moans, watch how my wetness covers my fingers, pay attention to what makes my body squirm and listen to me as I tell you to make me cum.

^^^

masturbatetothis:

thesexqueen:

I would like this every evening. Please take note, sometimes slow and gentle is the key to making a girl cum. It’s a delicate space and we are not pornstars who want our pussys beaten just because you like the way it makes you feel strong. If you’re really invested in my pleasure you will listen to my moans, watch how my wetness covers my fingers, pay attention to what makes my body squirm and listen to me as I tell you to make me cum.

^^^


whyant:

ctrl-alt-dance:

Found in a book at work @whyant this made me giggle and also think of you

this is actually a very gay supper party but its missing the main ingredient


the main ingredient is dick

You have to beat the salty breadsticks vigorously

whyant:

ctrl-alt-dance:

Found in a book at work
@whyant this made me giggle and also think of you

this is actually a very gay supper party but its missing the main ingredient

the main ingredient is dick

You have to beat the salty breadsticks vigorously


Found in a book at work
@whyant this made me giggle and also think of you

Found in a book at work
@whyant this made me giggle and also think of you



sharingneedles:

I MADE A DIAGRAM OF ME

sharingneedles:

I MADE A DIAGRAM OF ME

(via officialfrenchtoast)


slayboybunny:

everything is a competition unless I’m losing and then fuck off not everything has to be a competition asshole

(via officialfrenchtoast)


fluffymb:

The moment when the table turns.

(via heyfunniest)



official-sebastianstan:

Everyone Loves a Good Car Jam!!! - by Thomas Sanders

LITERALLY THE BEST PART IS YOU CAN SEE THE PURE SHOCK ON HIS FACE

(via whyant)